St. Patrick’s Day ended with a nice Irish stout, as it should have.
And it started with a zoom class featuring the entire 7th grade, as Wednesdays always do.
But the middle...the middle was reserved for parent/teacher conferences.
And those went something like this:
Ding!
*admit*
...minutes spent watching face on the other side of the screen struggling to connect to audio and position the camera to showcase the perfectly chiseled chin (ideally) or the inside of a nostril (more likely)...
Finally...
Hello! Welcome! Thanks for making the time to meet and talk about your Jonah…I was excited to see him last week. It had been a while…...Apparently, he was having trouble with his camera? And his mic hasn’t been working?.....Oh, would you? That would be great. I’d really appreciate it if you could help him get that all working….I know that the chromebooks that were sent home to all remote learners were fully functional back in September…. Sometimes when his sister joins, she’s able to get the camera and mic working….
...a small girl’s face appears, mugging for the camera and popping in and out of the camera view. A boy’s voice is heard yelling in the background, then sounds of a scuffle, and the small face disappears…
Yes! I've met your daughter. She’s sweet. She often comes to class with Jonah…they seem to get along well...She’s gifted with technology you say? Well, she’s really good at changing his background and using the ‘raise hand’ function...He seems to spend a lot of his day helping her... sometimes he misses class...She’s excited for when she’ll be in 7th grade? Oh, I’m so glad. It will be great to have her here. Just five more years to go! She sure loves to chime in during class..
...parent turns to yell at kids, mic hot...
Classwork?…..Well, it seems that he’s having some difficulty completing assignments, that’s why your Google Classroom report shows such a long list of ‘missing assignments’.............No, those zero’s mean he turned in a blank assignment….Of course he can still do the work for credit……...Yes, Millie comes to class regularly with him. I’ve never seen such a big dog! She does love to sit in your son’s lap! And so affectionate.........Yes, I imagine it costs a lot to feed a dog like that. I watched her eat a book in class last week. Jonah couldn’t quite get to her in time………. He does still need to read the book. I’ll see if I can find another copy ... Wednesdays?... No...Wednesday isn’t a day off. The kids have classes all morning and then extra help sessions are offered in the afternoon, plus we have drop in office hours….Yes, extra help is available….Well, he has to show up for the extra help…yes, an email reminder is always sent…..he just has to use the same zoom link he uses for class each day.….Well, he does excel at some things, of course!…Did you know he’s considered the class champ at Among Us?....Yes, I discovered that when he was playing during class one day...Mmmmm, his mic was on and working that day...
...minutes spent watching parent breathe deeply, grab a tissue, blow their nose and collect their emotions...
I understand….You’ve got a lot on your plate...I’m sure this year has been very hard on you…..Thank you for all your efforts...I know how much you love your boy and are doing your best ….. We all are. Let’s hope we get through this with our senses of humor intact…
Ding
Ok, well, it’s been delightful talking with you. if you don’t have any other questions for me, my next conference is here…
Ding
*admit*
And repeat.
And it started with a zoom class featuring the entire 7th grade, as Wednesdays always do.
But the middle...the middle was reserved for parent/teacher conferences.
And those went something like this:
Ding!
*admit*
...minutes spent watching face on the other side of the screen struggling to connect to audio and position the camera to showcase the perfectly chiseled chin (ideally) or the inside of a nostril (more likely)...
Finally...
Hello! Welcome! Thanks for making the time to meet and talk about your Jonah…I was excited to see him last week. It had been a while…...Apparently, he was having trouble with his camera? And his mic hasn’t been working?.....Oh, would you? That would be great. I’d really appreciate it if you could help him get that all working….I know that the chromebooks that were sent home to all remote learners were fully functional back in September…. Sometimes when his sister joins, she’s able to get the camera and mic working….
...a small girl’s face appears, mugging for the camera and popping in and out of the camera view. A boy’s voice is heard yelling in the background, then sounds of a scuffle, and the small face disappears…
Yes! I've met your daughter. She’s sweet. She often comes to class with Jonah…they seem to get along well...She’s gifted with technology you say? Well, she’s really good at changing his background and using the ‘raise hand’ function...He seems to spend a lot of his day helping her... sometimes he misses class...She’s excited for when she’ll be in 7th grade? Oh, I’m so glad. It will be great to have her here. Just five more years to go! She sure loves to chime in during class..
...parent turns to yell at kids, mic hot...
Classwork?…..Well, it seems that he’s having some difficulty completing assignments, that’s why your Google Classroom report shows such a long list of ‘missing assignments’.............No, those zero’s mean he turned in a blank assignment….Of course he can still do the work for credit……...Yes, Millie comes to class regularly with him. I’ve never seen such a big dog! She does love to sit in your son’s lap! And so affectionate.........Yes, I imagine it costs a lot to feed a dog like that. I watched her eat a book in class last week. Jonah couldn’t quite get to her in time………. He does still need to read the book. I’ll see if I can find another copy ... Wednesdays?... No...Wednesday isn’t a day off. The kids have classes all morning and then extra help sessions are offered in the afternoon, plus we have drop in office hours….Yes, extra help is available….Well, he has to show up for the extra help…yes, an email reminder is always sent…..he just has to use the same zoom link he uses for class each day.….Well, he does excel at some things, of course!…Did you know he’s considered the class champ at Among Us?....Yes, I discovered that when he was playing during class one day...Mmmmm, his mic was on and working that day...
...minutes spent watching parent breathe deeply, grab a tissue, blow their nose and collect their emotions...
I understand….You’ve got a lot on your plate...I’m sure this year has been very hard on you…..Thank you for all your efforts...I know how much you love your boy and are doing your best ….. We all are. Let’s hope we get through this with our senses of humor intact…
Ding
Ok, well, it’s been delightful talking with you. if you don’t have any other questions for me, my next conference is here…
Ding
*admit*
And repeat.